


love's not a competition (but i'm winning)

by sweetheartbitterheart



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Biting, Competition, F/F, F/M, Jealous Number Five | The Boy, Jealousy, Kinda?, Kissing, Pining, Possessive Behavior, Possessive Number Five | The Boy, Praise Kink, five never left
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:01:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26135404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetheartbitterheart/pseuds/sweetheartbitterheart
Summary: When Allison discovers Vanya and Five have kissed before she has even gotten a first kiss, she decides to rumor Vanya for practice. But Vanya doesn't mind and seems to want to share kisses with Allison.Five is decidedly not happy about this development.
Relationships: Allison Hargreeves & Vanya Hargreeves, Allison Hargreeves/Vanya Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Allison Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy/Vanya Hargreeves
Comments: 18
Kudos: 224





	love's not a competition (but i'm winning)

**Author's Note:**

> i wanted to attempt writing some vanyallison but fiveya still owns my heart so this came about. they're about 16 here, five never left, and ben doesn't die.
> 
> also huge thanks to Tori and Jari for your input and general sweetness 🥰
> 
> title from the eponymous song by Kaiser Chiefs

Rumoring Vanya for a kiss was not that bad in the grand scheme of things, Allison rationalized.

It's partially because of Klaus and his big mouth, so some blame has to fall on him. During lunch one afternoon, he had started making smooching noises at Vanya and Five. Vanya blushed ferociously, which wasn't anything new, and Five jumped to stand behind him landing a hard smack to the back of his head, which was _sort of_ new.

Dad viciously reprimanded them both for it but Five's self-satisfied grin indicated he thought it was worth it.

That little display piqued Allison's interest.

She caught Klaus by the arm on the way up the stairs. "What was that all about?" she demanded.

"What? That I was just assaulted?" Klaus inquired, pulling his arm back.

She rolled her eyes, "No. Why were you making those faces at Five and Vanya?"

At that, Klaus's eyes lit up. "Oh! Didn't you hear?" She tilted her head impatiently, before he started sing-songing, " _Five and Seven sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g._ "

Suddenly Ben appeared beside Klaus, looking especially irritated. "Vanya told me that in confidence, you dolt!" he said. Allison had never heard her quietest brother sound so loud or so angry before.

Klaus turned to him, shit-eating grin on his face, "And I was _confidently_ eavesdropping."

They began bickering in earnest then but Allison tuned them out, as she usually did. Her mind was preoccupied with thoughts of Vanya and Five, and them kissing.

Frustration swelled inside her.

Vanya got her first kiss before she did.

That just won't do.

-

A couple nights after that enlightening conversation, Allison stalled in the doorway of the bathroom after brushing her teeth. Vanya was always the last one in the bathroom and she was carefully brushing her own teeth, self-conscious in the way she was aware of Allison watching her.

When Vanya finished, she kept her head down, hiding behind her bangs as she tried to slip past Allison.

Vanya always walked a fragile between wanting her siblings' attention and being terrified of what would happen if she received it. Allison was always the one she was most scared of.

Allison moved a few inches, sufficiently blocking Vanya's path to the hallway.

Vanya looked up at her, brown eyes wide with surprise and curiosity. Allison noted that while Vanya did remind her of a mouse, she was also a little cute. With her cheeks stained pink and her big doe eyes, Allison found herself feeling strangely warm about her only sister.

She put on her most sincere smile, "Vanya."

Vanya bit her bottom lip but stared directly in Allison's eyes. Brave little mouse.

"I heard a rumor that you kissed me," Allison said, the thrill she always got when she used her powers rushing through her. She barely got to enjoy seeing Vanya overtaken by her rumor before she's pressing her soft little mouth against Allison's.

The kiss was sweet and chaste. They broke apart quickly and Allison caressed Vanya's cheek, which was warm under her hand.

Allison beamed down at her, "Thank you, Vanya."

She opened and closed her mouth a few times, but Allison had already turned and walked down the hallway to her bedroom, feeling accomplished and delighted.

-

When Vanya knocked on her bedroom door the next day in between classes and training, Allison was admittedly a little surprised.

But her sister just smiled shyly at her as she said very clearly, "You know you didn't need to rumor me for that. I would've done it if you just asked."

Allison stared at her, letting Vanya's words wash over her. Vanya was blushing a deep red and nervously playing with her fingers.

"Oh, really?" Allison grinned, the edge of something dangerous in her voice causing Vanya to shiver.

Vanya nodded, "Really."

At that, Allison's grin widened and she brushed a small kiss to Vanya's cheek. With the promise of more kisses to come, she flounced off to training.

-

The thing is Vanya will always be a bit desperate for attention and affection. At her sixteen years of age, she has come to realization with keen awareness. She can't help but look up to Allison, who is pretty and talented and powerful. Vanya wants some of that shining talent to rub off on her.

She only hopes Five won't mind.

He definitely won't _get_ it but he often doesn't get social interactions, or her need for more of it. She firmly believes that in Five's mind she should be content with his company and his company only.

Vanya doesn't mind helping Allison practice kissing. She even looks forward to it. She can actually be useful to her sister.

( _Vanya would not give up Five as her first kiss though. He is her first many things. Her first friend, her first crush, the first person she always wants to share her thoughts with. He's carved a permanent place in her heart forever. She wouldn't trade their closeness for anything._ )

-

So some nights after dinner Allison will lead Vanya back to her room, much to the puzzlement of Luther and the ire of Five. Allison can barely contain a laugh at the pure fury on Five's face. Once she explains to Luther, she knows he'll understand. She's only practicing with Vanya so that when she and Luther finally kiss it'll be perfect. Like something out of a fairytale or a Hollywood romance.

They sit on her bed and while Vanya tries to gain the courage to meet her eyes Allison will touch her hair or her hand. She relishes in seeing Vanya blush. Allison always initiates first by tilting Vanya's face towards hers and brushing her lips against hers gently. They always start out gentle but Allison is eventually able to get Vanya to open up for her. Allison will lick at the seam of her lips until Vanya moans allowing Allison's tongue to slide in. Their tongues might wrestle for dominance but Allison always gains the upper hand.

It's ridiculously easy for Allison to tug Vanya into her lap, holding her face in her hands to kiss her languidly. The little gasps and sighs Vanya make only urge her on.

Allison will never admit this to Vanya, or anyone else, even Luther, but she likes this strange closeness she's been able to capture with her sister.

Vanya always giggles by the time they stop for the night. Sometimes she'll tentatively curl a finger around a strand of Allison's hair, eyes alight with adoration. Allison absolutely lavishes that look. There's extra satisfaction in the fact that it's coming from her mousy little sister, because even she's in awe of the great Allison Hargreeves.

-

Allison should've expected the simmering rage coming her way from Five for daring to touch Vanya.

He corners her in the hallway after breakfast, teleporting to stop her from trying to get around him.

"What exactly do you think you're doing?" he demands, green eyes ablaze.

She decides to play coy just to mess with him, "What?"

"You know what. Vanya," he snarls.

She pretends to realize something, "Oh, yeah. It's just… girl stuff. You wouldn't understand."

"I think I understand perfectly."

She stifles a laugh which only further infuriates him.

Five takes a threatening step towards her, the look in his eyes not dissimilar to the one he uses to taunt criminals on their missions. "She's not a toy you can pick up and play with whenever you feel like and then disregard when you're bored, Allison," he tells her menacingly. 

She tilts her head and stands up straighter. They're no longer around the same height. She'd been hoping at least one of her brothers would stay a few inches shorter than her, but alas like the rest of them, Five had a growth spurt and towered over her too. At least Vanya is still shorter than her.

"Vanya's a big girl. She can make her own decisions," she says.

He makes a frustrated noise, hands curling into fists at his sides.

Wow, she's honestly a bit surprised just by how angry this is making Five, but it is delicious to see him lose his cool. He deserves to be knocked down a peg or two.

She gives him a pitying look.

"Maybe I'm just a better kisser than you, Five," she says before tossing her hair over her shoulder and walking away.

-

Five keeps sending glances Vanya's way when he should be finishing the equation that he's been working on for months but he can't focus. Not with the knowledge that Allison is playing some twisted kissing game with Vanya is coiling around in his gut.

Turning fully to stare directly at Vanya, he drops the chalk he's been frustratedly fiddling with. She's sitting on his bed, legs crossed, history homework in her lap.

"Are you having trouble?" she asks, looking up at him, her bangs falling into her eyes.

He shakes his head, "No."

She puts her pencil down and gives him an imploring look. She can read him so well, knows all his tells and ticks. He rubs the back of his neck and begins pacing the floor.

"Does this have anything to do with me hanging out with Allison?" she pries delicately. He can see a faint dusting of pink pooling in her cheeks.

Hanging out is one way to describe it.

"I don't know why you let her do that," Five fumes, his anger finally flaring to life.

"I don't let her do anything. I like it," Vanya says, a stubborn jut to her jaw now.

Five furrows his brow, "What? How?"

She shrugs, "I don't know. It's nice. It's different than with you. She's… _Allison_."

There is a dreamy look to Vanya's face now. Five hates it. He knows Vanya always wants attention from the rest of their siblings, from Allison, but it grates on Five. He doesn't like to think of Vanya with those morons. She's different. She's special. He might've been the only one to see that, the others have taken too long to notice, and now Five doesn't feel like sharing.

( _Five is not afraid or ashamed to say that Vanya is his favorite, because above all else, she is his. He found her first. No one gets him like her and he knows he's the only one who gets her. He's never had to fight for her but he more than gladly will, even if it is his own family._ )

-

The next training session goes off the rails quickly.

They're split up into groups for sparring and unfortunately Allison and Five are paired up together.

Allison is rarely allowed to use her rumor during sparring and this time is no different. Five is an especially tricky opponent to have in sparring practice, despite him also rarely allowed to teleport, but because he's good and sometimes seems to even enjoy beating them.

They flit around each other. She lands a hit to his shoulder but he gets her back in the side. She knocks an elbow into his stomach and rolls underneath him to duck a punch to her face. With a small running start, she aims for his legs, hoping to knock him off balance, but Five is quicker. He hits her hard in the throat, causing her to stumble backwards.

After catching her breath, she gets a good look at his face, and he simply shrugs.

She lunges for him with all the grace of a feral cat. Slamming her body into his, knocking him down to the mat, she sucker punches him. He's restrained himself somewhat so far but now he looks absolutely enraged. He punches her in the side of the head. But she's got her hands around his throat, bracing to squeeze and squeeze until his smug face is blue from lack of oxygen.

All too soon, or not soon enough, there's a crackle of energy and a flash of blue, leaving Allison to fall face forward onto the mat. Five had jumped himself across the training room, nearly bumping into Diego and Klaus.

"What the hell?" Diego exclaims, shoving Five a little, but he's only glaring at Allison.

She sits up and glares right back at him.

-

That night, when Allison has Vanya in her room, she goes from kissing her lips to dragging her mouth along Vanya's throat. She licks and nips down the tendon, relishing in the way Vanya moans. She tugs Vanya's hair, tilting her head back a little to gain access to the corner of her jaw, sucking a red mark there. The little yelp Vanya lets out causes a pleasant stirring in Allison's gut.

"Oh, Fi-Allison…" she whimpers, pulling at Allison's shirt sleeve, trying to bring her closer.

Allison laughs into Vanya's waiting mouth as she reclaims it. She kisses her hard and hungry.

-

The searing look Five shoots Allison the next morning at breakfast almost startles her. It is pure, unfiltered rage. There's a brief moment when she actually thinks he might crawl across the table and throttle her with his bare hands. The innocent look on her face is only betrayed by the wicked glint in her eyes.

At one point while they're eating, Vanya reaches up and scratches her neck. Both Allison and Five's eyes follow the movement. Five grips his fork tight enough to bend it in half.

-

Vanya is steadily practicing her Vivaldi in her bedroom during the afternoon when she's startled by the bright blue flash that always signals the arrival of Five. She ceases playing and gives him a quizzical look.

"I thought you still had training for another half hour," she says.

She puts her violin away because she can tell Five has something on his mind.

"Ended early," he explains, "Klaus tripped and claimed he sprained his ankle. The old man was not pleased."

She nods, feeling Five's gaze on her. Before she can turn around to face him, he's crowded up behind her, nuzzling her neck. His hands practically encircle her whole waist. She whimpers when he begins pressing kisses up and down her throat, the opposite side where Allison's hickey resides.

"F-five," she mumbles, a pleasant buzzing slowly building in her center.

"Shh, it's okay," he whispers into her skin, grazing his teeth there, "I just want to be close to you. Don't you want to be close?"

A high pitched moan escapes her mouth as Five sucks a dark mark on her throat. A gentle hand reaches down and begins to tug on her nipples through her shirt. Pleasure sparks through her. This is new territory for them but she's thoroughly enjoying it. She tilts her head back, letting it fall to his shoulder. His free hand comes up to turn her head towards his so he can finally kiss her lips. She whimpers from the dual sensation of his fingers teasing her nipples and his tongue claiming her mouth.

When breathing becomes too difficult, he breaks the kiss and goes back to her neck. He lavishes a gentle kiss first before biting down. She yelps and jerks in his arms.

Vanya goes limp as a noodle, relying on Five's weight just to stay standing.

Breathing heavily, she mumbles out, "What brought that on?"

She can't see him but she knows he's smirking, "Just missed you is all."

Vanya shifts a little against the familiar weight of Five behind her.

"Five, I think you still have your gun from training on you," she comments.

"Uh, what?"

Five is deeply grateful for their position so that Vanya is unable to see the way his face heats up. Reluctantly, he loosens his hold on her, embarrassment and arousal burning through him.

-

It continues on like this for a little over a month. Every other night Vanya goes to Allison's room and practices kissing with her. The other nights Five jumps to Vanya's bedroom where they kiss and slowly straddle the line of doing more.

Whatever shred of Five's patience he had is wearing incredibly thin. He wants Allison to stop toying with Vanya and go back to mooning over Luther. The sad sack is becoming increasingly moody over not having the full attention of Allison anymore.

During their free time, Five will take even more opportunities to spend time alone with Vanya. He used to try to spread it out so they wouldn't get caught. Except now he loses several nights with her because Allison sunk her greedy claws in Vanya.

They're supposed to be studying with Ben, who also seems distraught to not have as much time with Vanya as he used to. Five is reclining in a chair by the window while Vanya and Ben are at the table going over Ben's English essay. Vanya stands up, heading over to the bookcase. It's too easy for Five to catch her wrist and pull her into his lap. Ben rolls her eyes, but Five doesn't care, he has something to prove and he wants her close. He wants Vanya close always, to be perfectly honest.

She yelps a little and turns to frown at him. His response only comes in the form of tugging her closer still and resting his chin on her shoulder. He feels her sigh and she pets his head, which he scowls at. He's not a dog. But then Vanya begins stroking his hair, scraping her nails across his scalp the way he likes it, and he loses himself to her careful ministrations.

-

Five is brushing his teeth that night when Ben, quiet as a ghost, shows up beside him.

"You should just tell Allison that you actually like Vanya," he says, "She'll probably leave her alone then."

Five spits and turns to his kindest brother. "I know you mean well, Ben, but Allison is manipulative and power hungry. She won't care. She'll keep this going until she gets bored of playing with Vanya's feelings."

Ben looks unconvinced, "I'm not so sure." Five crosses his arms over his chest and motions for Ben to continue, "Allison's a romantic at heart. If she knows you really like Vanya and care about her, I think she would back off."

Five isn't sure he believes that of Allison. The only genuine kindness he's seen her bestow has been to Luther, Pogo and Mom. He's much more aware of her carefully constructed kindness that she totes out in the public eye.

"I'll think about it," Five relents.

-

Ben is the one who tells her that Luther is looking for her in the library but when Allison wanders in all she is hears is the sound of sighing then a laugh. She follows the sounds to the more secluded area of the library only to be struck by the image of Five pressing Vanya up against a bookcase. He's holding her up by her hips while Vanya's legs are locked around his waist and her arms are draped around his shoulders. Five's mouth moves against Vanya's with precision and fervor and Vanya is giving back as good as she gets.

Allison isn't stunned by the act. She's only stunned by the obvious passion in their kissing.

Vanya is clinging to Five as if her life depends on it. Her face flushed, hair all tousled, and her skirt riding up high enough that Allison can just catch a glimpse of her panties. Five's grip on her looks slightly painful. They break apart for a brief moment, chests heaving. They only have eyes for each other, despite the fact that Five is probably aware Allison's here watching. She knows with almost absolute certainty he orchestrated this.

Vanya releases a small whimper, "Five."

He grips her chin in his hand, kisses her hard, "You belong with me. You're _mine_."

He's looking at Vanya with a warm, steady gaze that threatens to take Allison's breath away. Even though she's witnessing a very impassioned make-out session between them, it's that look that almost feels too private for Allison to have seen.

Five pecks Vanya's lips once more before kissing along her jaw and then down her throat. The sensation must be nice by the moans Vanya continues to make and the way she keeps squirming in his grasp. He appears to bite her earlobe which causes Vanya to jerk against him, her legs squeezing around his waist.

Vanya whimpers his name again, opening her mouth for another kiss which he happily provides her. It is a bruising, possessive kiss too by the looks of it.

With one last look at the two of them, Allison's eyes catch Five's, his gaze clearly saying ' _She's mine. Back off_ '.

Allison will admit defeat this once.

**Author's Note:**

> we stan allison for inadvertently helping get five and vanya together
> 
> ALSO, fiveya week is an awesome thing organized by some awesome fiveya fans and it's coming up soon. the prompts were just posted to give everyone enough time to prepare if they wanna participate. the dates are November 1st through November 7th! check out the fivevanya tumblr if you have any questions 😄
> 
> prompts:  
> day 1: memories  
> day 2: dancing/training  
> day 3: childhood  
> day 4: sparrow academy AU  
> day 5: guilt  
> day 6: endings/beginnings  
> day 7: free choice


End file.
